Lemme give you an update:
I walked into Angel Food Catering, and Mike said, “We’re going to leave for the wedding in a minute, but let’s sit down and talk for a second.” We sat down.
“Listen, Robert. If we go to this event and you like how things go and I like how things go and I offer you a job, this is what I‘m looking for. I’m looking\ for a point man. I want you to free up some of my time so that I can get down to the office. You’ll need to keep things orderly, running smoothly. Okay?”
“Sure,” I said.
“Okay. Do you wanna roll?”
“Sure,” I said again.
“Hey, Jim, get this man a roll.”
So I ate my roll while Mike talked some more, and, now, I work at Angel Food Catering. And ever since then, I’ve been looking for a place in Yipsi to buy delicious muffins. It‘s been a tumultuous journey. Frozen blueberries aren’t any good in muffins (unless you like that gelatinous, indistinct sort of thing), so I don’t recommend B-24’s, and Beezy’s has average-tasting infant-sized muffins. I‘m looking for hearty. The Ypsi Bakery has good-sized muffins, but it seems like that business is only open when certain stars are aligned. I’ll keep you apprised of my findings.
I don’t want to bore you with my life preceding the THEYPSI MUFFIN HUNT because I know there’s nothing better than a good muffin. In fact, I’m saving up to buy a new muffin pan. I gave my last one to Joline when we graduated. Very solemn occasion.
And, the other day, Judy and I were doing a bread-tasting at the Ypsi Co-Op because we were thinking about outsourcing our bread production for this big wedding that is coming up in a few weeks. We tasted a few breads, and they tasted a lot like bread, and it seemed as though the baker had a decent head on his shoulders because of it.
We were asking Chris the Baker questions. He was answering them. I wasn’t paying attention to this. I was looking around the bakery. And on the bread rack, I saw an ant with it‘s ass covered in flour.
You realize, now, that I’m about to talk about this ant when I haven’t explained anything about Judy. This is because the ant is the central character in the story. Judy isn‘t a central character, but she’s a real person, and you’ll find out about her eventually, if you regularly read the blog. I know that I could have entirely cut Judy from the story, but this is a true story, and I don’t want to short Judy from her time to in the spotlight, and I don’t want you to think that I’m lying to you.
So I looked at this ant with an ass full of flour, and I said, “Ant, what are you doing here.”
It said, “I’m working. I’m collecting food. I‘m bringing it back to the farm.”
I said, “Looks like you’re just messing around in the flour.”
It said, “Nope. I’m working my ass off.”
The muffins at Zingerman’s haven’t impressed me either. I ate one of their cinnamon and sugar muffins. It tasted like a doughnut. I want a muffin that tastes like a muffin, by golly.