Thursday, June 9, 2011

Trust: Boogy Games

Today, a woman looked down my throat and said, "Oh, man. That's atrocious."

That's how I learned I got mono. You get mono from kissing people. Since Robbie isn't around, that narrows the list of suspects to one.

The health-care providers at the Urgent Care clinic, however, do not have my love sponsoring a greater level of forgiveness. I put my trust in them when I go sit in that room where I am afraid to touch anything for fear it has herpes or urine on it. I am vulnerable, admittingly dealing with a problem that is beyond my scope of knowledge (problem=why are adenoids all of a sudden bigger than moose testicles) , asking to be rescued by an expert.  Taking all of this into account, it bothers me when a person where the blue robes of power, or the white coat of knowledge, just probes me with some hopefully sanitary instrument and then walks out the door without giving me any sort of explanation of what the hell is going on.

I did not just take being treated as a petri dish specimen without any sort of retaliation. Most of the time, turning the other cheek involves me farting in the general direction of whoever slapped me. So the nurse just walked out after poking and prodding me, and to make their lives equally unpleasant, I picked up some really clean-looking metalware and played with it. When the nurse returned 5 to 6 minutes later and saw me fondling her recently sanitized inventory, she was frustrated. I relished the fact that she noticed that I had an iphone and a kindle with me, and still I chose to entertain myself with her evil contraptions. Hopefully, in the future, she will tell people where she is going and ask them not to screw with her laboratory while she is gone.

Another class of people who had my trust but no guarantee of forgiveness are cellphone company sales representatives. I walked in the Verizon store yesterday wanting to enter a contract with the company for an iphone and a plan. The conversation should have been simple. Here is what I want. How much does it cost?

But she couldn't just tell me how much it costs. Instead of saying, "That will run you $80 per month," she spent 30 minutes screwing around with a calculator to no avail, and when she came up with a figure, it made me happy. Then, as I was ready to hand over my credit card and sign, she said, "So, with the 13% tax and the other numerous $25 fees, it comes to..."

What the hell. My question from the start was, "How much is this going to cost me?" Why she thought I meant, how much is that going to cost me not including tax and other hidden fees, I don't know. I felt betrayed, having that information thrown at me in the last 2 minutes of our 40 minute interaction. I had been nice to this lady. Her English sucked, and she kept asking us if we would like to reservate our phones. I said nothing.  She had a really annoying booger dangling out of her left nostril. And it didn't just dangle, it was a little magician booger that disappeared every time she inhaled and then dropped back down all excited when she exhaled, like it was playing a baby game with you.

I didn't say anything, but after the last minute price increase, we left without buying the phones.

These stories are allegories. Be conscious of the trust people are putting in you during your various social interactions, and treat it with care.

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